Friday, April 3, 2009

Um Manaf Thinks She's That Girl in that Nike Commercial

It is with great pleasure that I inform you that you will not be rid of Um Manaf anytime soon, she is alive and well (though she can't feel her second and fourth toe in her right foot).

The day before:
10:30 pm

Flana's Sister: Ha Um Manaf bacher jogging il sa3a 6 ok?
Um Manaf: Khala9 mashy ana 3indi study group a6la3 minhom o I meet you..
Flana's Sister: Sheno? Study group il 9eb7? ya7lailich wala!
Um Manaf: *eyes pop out* qa9dich jogging at SIX AM?!
Flana's Sister: ee 3ayal mita?
Um Manaf: *tear roll downs her cheek* ok-k-kkay..

Today:
5:35 am

Alarm rings and Um Manaf sits up in bed wetdiz msg 7ag refeejat'ha "ha ga3adtay" (silently she prays for no reply)...and there is none!

Just as Um Manaf prepares herself to go back to sleep her mobile beeps "ee ana bil 6ereej almost at your house"

*another tear rolls down her cheek*

So ebsir3a badalt o nezalt o as we're driving to _________ its starts to rain.

Um Manaf:
*heyyyaa now akeed betridni baitna*
Flana's Sister: Hope you brought a sweater *big smile*
Um Manaf: *shit*

During my 7km "jog"

1. Tesaba7t min il mu6ar. Not a single inch of my clothes were dry and it was FREEZING.

2. Bechait. I don't know how it happened bes at one point wayhi intaras dmoo3 (I am not ashamed of my silent tears! It doesn't mean i'm weak! I'm only human, if you cut me do I not bleed?! Inzain fine..i was a little weak! A lot weak?....Leave me alone..)

3. Kan fe mara 3ayooz jedami...using a cane...jedami...as in sabgatni....as in I couldn't keep up...and she was limping....and bent over from how old she was...jedaaaaaami eb3eeeeeed...CANE!

4. At one point bedait amshi 3away. Don't ask laish. Don't ask how.

5. I saw no black spots and no white spots. This time kanaw purple and light blue. Is this like a karate thing? Kel loon is a level? What color do I have to see to get to the highest level?

6. After it was all done and she drove me back to my house, just as I was getting out of the car my friend turns to me and says "yala en3eed'ha bacher! this time my other sister is going to come...she's the athletic one! So we're going to really push it to the limit bacher..."

*Um Manaf silently swears under her breath and slams the car door shut*

19 comments:

sexy_sour_sweet said...

Dear um manaf,
Purple spots? You're scaring me now dear. Laish ga3 tabcheen? -.- It's not like she's hitting you;/
I don't think you should go with the athletic sister, cause You will want to commit suicide.
TC um manaf, and next time you'll see yellow spots.. I think;P

CrazyCatQ8 said...

waay waay shalla 7adeech !!! ???
1st the pupble means ur at the 3rd leavel .. still fee 7 more LOL

2nd ohom badyeen min ziman .. entay ga63a o radaitay !! and thats not good .. u should take it gradually girl !! wela ra7 tamsheen 3away for a long time ismila 3alaich LOL

HUGZ take it easy girl friend lol

shoosha said...

moo 3ajebni il modail il yedeed hatha!!

esh3ind il awadem egomoon min fayer allah to walk/jog!!! moo 3ajebni abadan abadan abadan.... ghayroo ;p

S E 7 E N said...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E_0Ta_DIWuU <-------- you running wahahahahahahahahaha

Um-Manaf said...

sexy_sour_sweet: awal shay thank you for your concern lol and I know there's a huge chance that I will commit suicide bacher haha..and lets hope that the yellow spots are bright and funky ;p I need entertainment while I run ..

CrazyCatq8: LOOOOOL iboy gali the same thing ;p yala lets hope I manage to pass the seven levels soon! Complete the rainbow and all that ;p

Shoosha: enshallah 6al 3omrich ;) .. everyone shall stop running as of this second! ;* .. goomay rekthay weyana! ;p

SE7EN: :( mu 7aram 3alaik? :(

zuz said...

um el menfyyyyyyyyyy;p shallah 7adich tarkethen ta7t el mu6ar!!! ro7ay gym, sunny days etc!!! :O, looooooooool 7araam laish bechaity hahahha*hugs*

ĐǻñĎõøðñ said...

LOOOOOOOOL!!

ambaih im laughing my head off wallah! =\

S E 7 E N said...

waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahahahaha ee ee thats the way you run waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahah

Um-Manaf said...

Zuz: madry I wanted to take advantage of the weather..gyms bore me to death! :( .. o madry laish bechait I think jismi was being tortured in a way it's never known before!

Dandoooon: bsmila 3ala ur head ;* ba3ad 3omri :D

Jam3iiya(L) said...

allah ma3ach walla, it was nice knowing you um-manaf ;'( ;'( you will be missed, haw haw HAW! ni6raaay!ni6raaaaay! in mitay min yikamil ilqisa?? la la la, hatha ma yi9laa7! hatha il kalam ma yamshii 3alaich, sim3ay 3ad.. in shifteech oo sima3t inich 6al3a tarke6een or "jogging" 3ala goltich, tara 7ashait irwoolich 7ash! fahmaaa?? zain, 3afya 3al sha6ra;**

;p

Um-Manaf said...

Se7en: remember the deal we made? The one where I won't drive so u stay safe? Well that's off!!

Jam3iya: looooooool chan zain a7ad ekhaf 3alay just for the sake of caring :(

Silver said...

hehehehe maskeena;p

bs walla ur lucky for getting a bit of exercise in ur day!

ana WIDEE i do any form of exercise bs mafe la time or place:/

im fat and unfit :(

eshda3wa said...

um manaf i have to say im proud of u babe

ya3ni ur seeing spots in all colors of the rainbow
but you still choose to jog.

i would never do it

so kudos to u !

Cooookies said...

id actually would like to try it sounds like fun except for the fact in an old lady with a cane 9begtech .. thats very sad ;s

Cooookies said...

id actually would like to try it sounds like fun except for the fact in an old lady with a cane 9begtech .. thats very sad ;s

Um Mit3ib said...

wesh7aga ta36eeeenhaa wayh !
w shiga3dech hal 7aza!!!

Um Mit3ib said...

wesh7aga ta36eeeenhaa wayh !
w shiga3dech hal 7aza!!!

Abi-Omi-Abi-Oboy said...

lOOOOOOOOOL 7arrrraaaam!! =* Ksartay Kha6re.. I hate waking up early, it sucks!..

Just say No ;)

DM said...

5. "I saw no black spots and no white spots. This time kanaw purple and light blue. Is this like a karate thing? Kel loon is a level? What color do I have to see to get to the highest level?"

Before I saw sexy_sour_sweet's comment, I was thinking yellow.

So yes, yellow would be it.

Rofl.